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Ferber Method

I have two dogs-a Chihuahua and a Boston Terrier. The Chihuahua is a male named Gumbo and the Boston is a female named Sophie. Sophie is about 8 years old and Gumbo is about 3-4 years old. Both were rescues and free-if you count vaccinations, neutering, medication, and doctor visits as free!

I increased my bed height to allow for storage beneath and my older dog can’t make the jump onto or off. Hell…she can’t do it when the bed is low either because of her arthritis. I need to get her stairs for the sofas and the bed.

Anyway, I digress…

They sleep with me. I don’t like it. Never have.

Gumbo likes to pee on my older daughter’s bed. It’s an issue. He pees all over the house actually. He poops indoors because the outdoors are just too scary-unless he is on a walk and can’t hold it and then it just sort of falls out. Gross-yeah, I know.

Last night, I had a great idea. I would lock them into the study with their beds and pillows and then they would be comfortable and happy-and I would too.

This, unfortunately, did not work because Gumbo scratched at the door for HOURS and howled. I live in an apartment. I can’t have a howling creature at night disturbing the neighbors. About 4 a.m. I opened the door to find both wriggling and demanding attention. Sophie had dragged my previously worn pajama pants off my desk chair to snuggle with. That sight made me feel incredibly guilty.

So, I did what I did with my own children (who still sleep with me sometimes)-I let them into my bed. Hoisting Sophie’s 20-lb pig body into my bed along with lifting 4-lb Gumbo effortlessly and tossing him into the sheets-I felt defeated.

I can’t have more children. I had a hysterectomy for medical reasons and was 100% fine with the decision. However, at 38 my brain must be making a last call because I’ll often dream I’m pregnant and wake up feeling sad that it isn’t real.

I have looked into fostering and adopting from Nepal or India. My children are half Nepalese so I thought similar siblings would be beneficial for the adopted child. Nepal isn’t allowing any adoptions and in India you must adopt a special needs child if you are not a citizen. As much as I’d like to adopt a child with special needs, I have my own special needs that limit what I can handle.

It’s amazing how biology can drive our decisions in life. If I still had a womb, I’d probably try for another child even though having a healthy baby at this stage in my life would still be problematic for me.

For now, and for the remainder of my life, dogs will be my babies. They make good babies and are just as annoying as the real deal.

 

 

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